As the plane soared through the clouds, I held back the tears, my heart a mix of sorrow and relief. I had left behind the land of opportunity, but more importantly, I had escaped the clutches of Edward Cullen. With a masters degree in hand and a transformed physique, I felt a sense of accomplishment that was tainted only by the heavy secret I carried with me.
My daughter, Matilda, peered at me with her curious eyes, holding a photograph that was a stark reminder of my past. "Mommy, who is this lady in the picture?" she asked, her voice filled with the innocence of childhood.
I winced at the sight of my former self, round and unrecognizable. "Shes an old friend of mine who I didnt get along with very well," I replied, my voice tinged with a hint of sadness.
Matilda, ever the inquisitive one, pressed on. "But Mommy, you told me always to tell the truth." I sighed, realizing that my daughter had inherited more than just my eyes; she had also gotten my knack for seeing through half-truths.
I decided to change the subject slightly. "Before I answer your question, Matilda, can you answer one for me?" I asked, my tone serious.
She nodded vigorously, her little face scrunched up in concentration. "If your mommy looked like this in the picture, would you still love her?" I showed her the photograph again.
Matilda pondered for a moment, her eyes flitting between the picture and my face. After what felt like an eternity, she declared, "No, I wouldnt want a mommy who looks so ugly. And..." she continued, her voice trailing off.
I braced myself for the rest of her words. "And what, sweetheart?" I prompted gently.
"And I dont believe my daddy would be so blind!" she finished, her tone matter-of-fact.
I couldnt help but laugh, a small bubble of joy bursting through the sorrow. "Well, your daddy was very handsome, like a movie star, tall and charming," I began, but Matilda interrupted me with her own narrative.
"But unfortunately, he didnt live long enough to see how cute I am, right, Mommy?" she said, repeating the story I had told her so many times.
"Yes, thats right," I confirmed, my heart aching at the lie I had to maintain. "Now, hurry up and pack your things. We need to go to Grandmas house."
As Matilda skipped away, her excitement palpable, I couldnt help but feel a pang of guilt. Would she be sad if she knew that I had lied about her father being dead? But I had no other choice. The child was an accident, a surprise that had changed my life in ways I could never have imagined.
Back then, I had been so focused on forgetting the incident and making ends meet that I barely had time to breathe.Plus I was fat, so it was five months before I found out I was pregnant. I had been so preoccupied with my studies and multiple part-time jobs that I only discovered my pregnancy when it was already five months along.
I remembered standing there, the pregnancy test in hand, my mind going blank at the sight of the babys shape silhouette. I had wanted to give up right then and there.
However, the foreign land I was in seemed unfazed by the concept of an unwed mother. Everyone encouraged me to bring the child into the world, and against all odds, I did.
The first glance at my child was a shock – she was far from pretty. The second glance revealed her fathers features, and by the third, I was in love. Matilda was mine, and I was hers, and that was all that mattered.
Matilda was a bundle of joy and mischief, and it was she who pushed me to shed the pounds and become the woman I am today. So, despite everything, I did not regret that night with Edward Cullen.
Now, with my studies complete and a longing for home, I knew I couldnt keep Matilda away from our homeland forever. It was time to return.